Suburban Grindhouse Memories: LUNCH WAGON (1981)
SUBURBAN GRINDHOUSE MEMORIES
30 Years Ago: Hormones and Whoremoans…
By Nick Cato
September, 1981: after having enjoyed screenings of FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 2 and a re-release of THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974) only a few weeks earlier, it was time to take a break from the gore and scares. Along comes a sex comedy titled LUNCH WAGON, with its enticing poster and newspaper ad (enticing for a bunch of thirteen year-old boys, anyway) nearly DARING us to try and get in without adult accompaniment. And thanks to Staten Island’s Amboy Twin Cinema (who let ANYONE in, so long as they had CA$H), my buddies and I waltzed right in and were set for who-knew-what (remember this was a full year before the sex comedy craze that came after PORKY’S and FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH were released). If not for the Amboy Twin Cinema (that has long since been replaced by a Perkins Restaurant), I wouldn’t have seen half the films I write about in this bi-weekly column. Man do I miss that place!
Two girls (played by Pamela Jean Bryant and Roseann Katon, both with impressive exploitation film credits) are roommates who also happen to be auto mechanics (!). They’re sick and tired of their sleazy boss spying on them as they dress for work (because, as you know, all female mechanics get undressed AT the garage), and when they confront him about their crappy salary and a host of other issues, the guy flips out and fires them. Aggravated, our two lovely ladies stop for lunch at a local lunch wagon (owned by Dick Van Patten, who goes unaccredited here although there’s two other Van Pattens with higher billing) and, after a talk about their future, manage to buy the lunch wagon off of Van Patten and start their own business. Realizing neither one of them can cook, they get their friend Diedre (played by Amazonia blonde Candy Moore, the woman who modeled for the cover of the classic album CANDY-O by THE CARS) then set up shop by a local construction site, where the girls start to get hit on by the workers and their business starts to take off. Deidre is the funniest of the group: she has a thing for short, dorky guys, and manages to control them like a dominatrix in the sack…
While the boobage wasn’t as high as our young perverted minds were hoping for (nor the laughs for that matter), we were treated to a surprise—another unaccredited appearance by a band called TERRI AND THE ROUGH RIDERS. One of the two songs they perform was quite catchy, and a few weeks after seeing the film I found a 12” single with said song (‘Mental Hopscotch’) by a band called MISSING PERSONS, and sure enough, it was the same band. I’m assuming MOST of LUNCH WAGON’s budget went to paying this up-and-coming new wave act. The band was made up of three members and two actors, one who our girl Diedre ends up dating in the film.
Despite the rockin’ tunes and cute cast (who call their lunch wagon “Love Bites”), the film doesn’t work too well as a comedy, and after a recent re-viewing, it doesn’t even hold up good as a teenage T&A feature, either. And yet for some reason I still can’t figure out, it’s quite entertaining. The screenwriter tried to deliver a bit of a story: a rival lunch wagon sets up shop near the same construction site, and of course it turns out to be a front for a bunch of jewel thieves. Even with the added gangster goofballs, LUNCH WAGON only offers an occasional chuckle and an even rarer flash of flesh. With everything it has going against it, the film is still worth it for the horrendous spandex outfits every female character seems to walk around in (which drew howls from the crowd, even in 1981), the great soundtrack, and it’s overall positive vibe: here’s a trio of girls with (seemingly) no future, making the best out of life by serving sandwiches at a construction site! If that doesn’t make you feel better about your own mundane existence I don’t know what will…
The déjà-vu I felt while watching this the first time in 1981 must’ve been due to the aforementioned female cast, who had previously starred in exploitation and horror epics such as H.O.T.S. (1979), DON’T ANSWER THE PHONE (1980), THE SWINGING CHEERLEADERS (1974), and even DEATH RACE 2000 (1975). In researching this article, I discovered the beautiful Pamela Jean Bryant had just passed away in 2010, which added a sad undertone to my recent viewing.
If you want to taste a pre-PORKY’S sex comedy that’s easy on the comedy and the sex but big on horrible fashion and kick-ass music, give LUNCH WAGON a try. (The film was also seen on late night cable TV under the title LUNCH WAGON GIRLS, and was released in Germany as HAMBURGER GIRLS).
Suddenly I’m in the mood for ham and Swiss on rye…
© Copyright 2011 by Nick Cato
The late great PAMELA JEAN BRYANT (the blonde in the white top), ROSEANN KATON (center), and Amazonian beauty CANDY MOORE are the LUNCH WAGON GIRLS
December 11, 2011 at 4:41 pm
Can someone tell me if Candy Moore who plays Dierdre is the same Candy Moore who played “Chris” in The Lucy Show? A couple of web sites say it IS her, but I just can’t see it. She had to have changed drastically and she would have been about 35 years old when the movie was made.
December 12, 2011 at 3:18 am
Hey Jimmy: I believe it is the same Candy Moore. IMDB has her listed for both (and there are 2 Candy Moore’s listed on the site, but one is totally different from the other). I don’t recall her from The Lucy Show, but she looks to be about 30-35 in Lunch Wagon…remember these girls are working girls, not high school students,, but regardless of HOW old she was in Lunch Wagon I thought she looked awesome.
December 12, 2011 at 3:21 am
OOPS—correction—the Candy Moore’s listed in imdb are the SAME person with the SAME credits—no idea why that is. There’s someone with a similar name I accidentally looked at.
January 22, 2012 at 2:49 pm
there are two CANDY MOORE’S for sure ..the one CANDY MOORE was a model who appears in this ..the other was an actress who was at one time married to PAUL GLEASON two different gals as far as i know….so this one is supposedly the one who modeled for CANDY-O cover which makes sense ..since the first shot is a 1979 CARS poster…DIRECTOR ERNEST PINTOFF must have done that for some reason or other ….THERE is a pic of this CANDY MOORE on rollerskates with DENISE CROSBY on the web too ….one other note is that ALBERTO VARGAS did use two models NANCY BETH a dancer and CANDY MOORE …he may have kept the facial features of NANCY BETH for the layout ….but went with CANDY’S body for that ..also of note if i am not mistaken CANDY MOORE did model for the NINE LIVES REO SPEEDWAGON cover too ..although i think she is in makeup to look of a darker skin …the inside pic of the cat like pose drawing is similiar in features as well ..but once again this is only speculation ..one can only imagine ..but i do think this is the same gal who dated DAVID ROBINSON the drummer of the CARS briefly since she modeled at a FERRARI dealership and VARGAS used her as a model ..take care jon